A Bath-based coach, speaker and teacher for MumsWhoThrive.com is on a mission to support mums feeling overwhelmed at home.
Madeleine Woolgar works with mums who are feeling exhausted by the day-to-day challenges of raising children. “Mums generally have some professional support preparing for the birth of their children, but once they are here, those mums are often on their own,” said Madeleine. “And yet mums often have incredibly high expectations of themselves as they navigate their journey of motherhood.
“It’s my job to help mums create a way to navigate parenting that nourishes both them and their children, so they can truly be the best parent they can. I help mums to find the mindsets they have that hinder their ability to show up for their children in the way they most want to. Once we realise our mindsets, we can learn to change them and have a much more comfortable experience of parenting, which means we have a greater capacity to be there for our child.
“What do I mean by mindsets? We are thinking things all day long and we very rarely take the time to look at our thoughts – or our mindsets. It is where our super power as a parent lies, but it is often a parenting technique that is massively overlooked. That’s what makes my approach both unique and very effective. Once we understand our mindsets, we can learn to change them and have a much more comfortable experience of parenting, which means we have a greater capacity to be an effective parent for our child.
As an example of the work she does, Madeleine highlighted the case of a mother called Alex (not her real name) who recently came to see her regarding her son. Her son would ask all day to go to the swings, but every time they tried to leave the play park, he had a huge tantrum. Alex would feel really uncomfortable as her child pounded the floor with his fists, thinking that everyone was judging her and her child. It made her feel like she wasn’t doing a good job as a mother because no matter what she did, she couldn’t get her son to calm down.
“We worked together for eight weeks and I helped her realise that when her son would tantrum, she was thinking that it meant she had done something wrong as a parent,” explains Madeleine. “This mindset meant she was trying to help her son from a really uncomfortable place, that made her very ineffective in helping him calm down: neither one of them was calm!
“I helped her create and sustain a new mindset, that this behaviour was not a reflection on her parenting. This meant that when her child next had the tantrum in the park, she had a very different reaction – she was calm, relaxed and had a much bigger capacity to be effective and loving in helping and calming her son.
“This mother emailed me the other day to say that since she made this mindset switch, her son hasn’t had a tantrum leaving the play park since. I see over and over again that when we change, our children’s behaviour changes too.”
For mums who would like to learn more, Madeleine is offering a free one-on-one Mother’s Breakthrough session. For more details go to www.mumswhothrive.com/starthere
Main photo ‘Bitsy and Bloom Photography’